I was sat with my friend last week when she told me she’d had odd results on a blood test and her doctor was sending her for further tests in case she has cancer.
I found myself going on about how it’s probably all fine and how mistakes are made on blood tests all the time. It wasn’t until after when I was driving home that it dawned on me that my friend didn’t need me going on about how everything is going to be fine, she needed me to just listen and let her know I’m there for her whatever happens. I did ring her and say this afterwards but I felt like an idiot.
It made me think about the times I’ve told people about the ivf and some of the things people have said. I’ve had to tell people plenty of times that things haven’t worked out with our ivf and I’m just hoping this time is different. However if I do have to do this again then at least my conversation with my friend has put things into perspective.
Sometimes people say things not because they don’t care but because they do and don’t know what to do or say. The random first thing comes into their heads and before you know it your being forced to drink a cup of tea while someone tell you get pregnant if you just relax or go on holiday.
To be honest I prefer it if someone tries to help and gets it wrong than people that just don’t say anything at all or the time one of my wife’s friends had a go at her, calling us both selfish and pathetic because she cancelled coming to his party on the day I found out I had a chemical pregnancy.